Thursday, December 20, 2007

thursday night

The day was very crisp and very clear, however it was not too chilly. I worked thru the day and left work late. I want to finish everything up so tomorrow can be more a relax then a rush around kind of day.

I came home to find my cat had knocked several things off the kitchen table and hacked up a hairball in the middle of the kitchen. Oh boy. After dinner the dogs and I went for a walk, albeit short, it was still a walk. We then watched three episodes of Dinner Impossible. That is a fun show and the time watching it was spent rubbing a few dog ears and listening to the cat purr. But there were a couple moments when the feeling of being overwhelmed hit. Just the thoughts of a christmas without Jim.

It was a quiet evening and the depression and solitude of the holiday is pressing in. I will work thru it and writing the blog will definately be a help to get the feelings out and not locked up. It makes a difference. I say this ahead of time so that anyone reading will realize that I am basically okay, but feeling very very sad this week.

I found in a box, our stocking from last year. Or maybe the year before. One is a stocking that I decorated and it has all of our names on it, Jim, mine and the kids (merc, tig and fig). The other stocking is one a friend gave me that has Superman on it. It is a nice collectible. I think I put comics in it last year. And an orange.

There was one very positive thing that I accomplished tonight. I hung some paintings that I found. These were done by my father, in watercolor, back in the late 50's. They are not the originals, he has those. However my mom had them scanned and printed for us kids. There are four in the set and I hung the three maritime themed ones. I had been out and got new frames and they look really nice on the wall.

I am going to crawl into bed and read a bit.

1 comment:

Laurie in Ca. said...

I've been thinking about you all week and hoping things are okay with you.
Ah Hairballs, relief for the cat but yucky for us to clean up. The pictures of your dads watercolors sound so special. Nice new touch to the house I am sure. I am praying for you Betsy, that during the sadness, you feel loved and needed. I am glad for you to have this blog to work through your journey. It is healthy for you to get it out so that it doesn't build up inside you. I admire your strength to continue forward inspite of the pain. I hope you have a wonderful Christmas with your family and just be yourself and soak up the love.

Laurie in Ca.