Tuesday, June 30, 2009


Two years, one month.

Yep, I am still counting, even if it just to myself.

I have been really emotional for the last few days and couldn't quite figure out why. The 29th sort of snuck up on me. I have had some early morning tears and some late night 'why's'. And just this evening driving to Walmart I thought about Jim's daughter and her new baby and a stray thought that popped in was "please tell him good things about his granddad" and it exploded in my head and it was all I could do to drive and cry at the same time.

It exploded because I know how much Jim would have loved to see his grandson. And how much he loved and was so proud of his children and what they had achieved. And how I really wish there was a way for his grandson to learn about him and I can only hope they he does.

I really don't like this being alone stuff, but I don't know who I could be with other than Jim right now, so I am stuck alone. There is no one to yell 'let the dogs out!' or to ask to get you some ice cream from the freezer or to help by rubbing their shoulders after a stressful day. He is missed.

1 comment:

Sharon said...


You are in my thoughts and heart today...as ever, thank you for sharing your heart with us....I have been single again for the past 25 years, and my adjustment to being alone for the last 10 years of that time has not always been pretty...but most of the time I live in joy and contentment in my single life -- I do have family near and friends...but have to admit that I really like to be by myself a good portion of my time...;)

My hope for you is that you will continue to open yourself up to others...maintain your social contacts from the days with Jim that are a blessing to you -- and I trust the Lord will bring new and renewed relationships for today and the future. blessings, friend,