This past week has been a whirlwind of moments. At work, at home, out and about. Keeping up has been hard to do. And coordinating it has been tricky. My blog posts have been neglected.
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Mercury and I go to the vets tomorrow to see what is up. But I already know. He is showing the same symptoms with food that he was showing a few months ago. And the base of his tongue - what is left of it - is very red. I need to see how much he is suffering, if antibiotics and pain meds may help more and make decisions. I was hoping for more time.
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That is either the cancer coming back or irratation when he eats. I am trying to make the food up myself and feed him, but he wants to eat, to chew, to taste. He walks around looking for things to try and eat. He is trying so hard to make it work. Then it gets stuck in the front of his mouth and he doesn't have the tongue to push it loose. Then it just becomes a drooling mess.
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Home is a challenge because with Mercury sick keeping things clean is nigh impossible. Things like the couch, my pants, my shirt my arms, the kitchen floor - they all get drool in various stages of ickiness on them. I have him regulated to two rooms and outside. I sat down last night to watch Lost and he came up, rubbed his face on my shirt and looked up at me. My shirt was soaked but his eyes stopped me from saying anything. I took the shirt off, wiped the rest of his mouth and chest with it and tossed it in the wash. Then I cried a little for him and yes, for me too and gave him another pain pill.
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I have about a dozen or so pictures of the two dogs in the doorway to the house. They love to sit there and just smell the outside. To watch the neighbors up and down the street and enjoy the breeze. I am usually on the steps just below the doorway making sure that a) they don't run out and b) the cat doesn't run out. I was sitting there the other day when I thought "photo op" and came back out with the camera.
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The bright light this week was in the wonderful amass of colors in my backyard. I went back out and got some more flowers and potted them for various spots around the yard. I also got this great hose - it is a coil hose. I love it because of the small yard, but especially because of the nozzle. To be able to 'shower' the flowers or 'jet' the concrete where the dogs pee or just 'mist' in the early morning is really neat. It is a simple pleasure, a simple toy, for a simple mind.
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The picture to the right is the yard. And it ends just about at the end of the grill in the right corner. Small and cozy. The graffiti on the back wall is mine. I did that one afternoon when I was tired of just looking back there and seeing the fence. It is a larger version of a doodling design that I find myself doing whenever I have paper and a pen and am on the phone. It is different all the time and there is some pyschological things to be said about it, but I don't know what.
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I can't remember the name of the flowers in the hangling baskets. Purple bursts of Pleasure. Well, this picture doesn't do them justice, but I absolutely love the colors and find them uplifting when I look at them.
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To look out at once was grey cement, grey fence and bare dirt where there should be grass, and see all this is cool for me. I find that I shake my head up and down saying 'yep, you got it right this time'. That makes me smile.
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2 comments:
Thanks for this lovely post, Betsy! You've done some wonderful container gardening for your backyard/retreat spot. I think the purple flowers are petunias, but your photo makes them look even fancier somehow.
I LOVE your picture of the dogs. I know you will really appreciate having that one in the future. May the Lord bless you as you make the hard decision about Mercury...whenever that may be. You have been a real blessing to him during these last years/months/days. Blessings on the end of your week,
The 'tunies (as I call them) are simply beautiful. :o) They have the most beautifully sweet fragrance as well. I'm so happy you have a nice place to sit and relax.
The spotties are beautiful too. :o) I'm so sorry Mercury seems to be regressing. I'll pray for him and an you and hope you both find comfort and peace.
Many HUGS!
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